#BubbleButt

I know y’all are super excited because today is Throwback Thursday! Which means we are mercilessly judging the fashion horrors of days past.

We’ve been at this blog for a little over a month and I continue to be shocked and horrified by the fashion decisions we felt were a good idea.

Cringe-worthy fashion trends made their way into our closets, our billboards, our lives. One such shudderingly-horrible fashion movement – Skidz.

Wearing Skidz is cool

First-off, let me state that my love of grammar and diction causes me to have a knee-jerk reaction when companies use the “z” is place of an “s.” It’s not necessary. It does not make you trendy or Millennially-minded. It makes you incorrect. Don’t do it.

So I am already prejudice about Skidz and its flippant use of the “z.” Respect the z. Leave it alone until you need it. You don’t need it unless you are telling us about your amazing zippers.

Cool Kidz

In the interest of full disclosure — I do not remember when this particular fashion trend was a thing. It was a few minutes before my time. However, I did grow up in the age of back-to-back Saved by the Bell and Fresh Prince of Bel-Air re-runs on Fox Family (which then became ABC Family, and is now Freeform). This trend does stand out in my mind as something kids eight or so years older than me did. And I judged.

Skidz.

It sounds like some sort of hardened street drug or the nickname of a horrific highway accident that killed 27 people.

Nope. This was the name of pants that people stepped into proudly in the morning time and then continued to wear for the duration of the day.

Presumably, these people had pride. And dreams. And hope. And they still slide their precious bodies into such a circus-esq article of clothing.

If clothing can be described as “ballooning,” I am skeptical.

The Plasticz.png

Merry Go Round is a store that has been extinct for a long, long time. Probably in part due to the Skidz. Look at these faces. These were The Plasticz of the late eighties. The one in the middle is their Regina George. Look at that sass. Where does he keep it all? Oh! Probably in that lovely Skidz-labeled fanny pack. Excellent decision, sir.

 

What was wrong with it?

Look at this band of cool kid misfits. One of them looks like a real-life Ken doll. They are too cool for school.

The TBirdz.png

While I can appreciate the diversity of Skidz — a different pattern for every different personality of teenager — it feels a little unnecessary.

Why all the different prints? This is obscene.

If you could jump out of a plane at a moment’s notice in the outfit you are in, it is not a good outfit.

Skidz are unflattering to every human being’s body and make them look like toddlers who grew too fast too soon.

 

Why did we love it?

Probably because they were comfortable. I am just guessing.

And probably because you could always hear where your friends were. Just follow the sound of nylon being rubbed together and there is Susie, walking down the hallway.

No.

 

How can we ensure that history doesn’t repeat itself?

Pants that fit, everyone!

Pants that don’t look roughly like scrubs, everyone!

Pants that couldn’t be put on a revolving wheel and hypnotize people based on the insane design, people!

Just — let’s be better, everyone.

 

We think Zoe Karssen has accomplished what Skidz was trying to.

Oh We See Youz.png

These pants are fun and comfy and versatile and don’t have any place for us to rest our fanny packs.

Real Peoplez

Make sure your local boutique has 810’s favorite Zoe Karseen joggers so you can rock this ridiculously trendy spring look.

 

Written by Shelby Dorsey, sadorsey@live.com
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